General Category => Making the Best of Bed Rest => Topic started by: SamRose on January 18, 2018 at 07:16 PM

Title: Bedrest Venting
Post by: SamRose on January 18, 2018 at 07:16 PM
I've been on bedrest for 6 months now (24 weeks), by the time I get my cerclage out it will be just over 7 months (29 weeks). I've done pretty well keeping myself occupied and busy in my feet up position, but boy does the lack of activity make me restless.

Anyway my rant..... Does it annoy any of you when you mention something about the drawback of bedrest being a lack of activity and/or boredom or general restlessness from not using any of your copious amounts of stored up energy and the person you are talking to is like "well enjoy all that rest now... soon you will be longing to relax again! Har Har Har (or some version of this sentiment)?

On the outside I smile and choke down my irritation, but on the inside there are about a thousand sarcastic replies running through my head. (This might have something to do with the crazy hormones and mood swings as well as frustration I'm sure)

But seriously like any pregnant woman doesn't already know that newborns are exhausting, or if we didn't know it when we got pregnant there aren't countless books, articles, and well intentioned people who have been telling us this since the moment that egg was fertilized.

Since there is no bank I can deposit all this "relaxing" rest into and withdraw later when I desperately need it, these comments are at best tone deaf and unhelpful.

Of course I'm grateful that so far all this bedrest has been working and our little man is cooking away safe and sound.... the cerclage comes out in 4.5 weeks and all my restrictions will finally be lifted. I can hopefully enjoy a small window of normalcy before my due date of March 11th.

I'm not sure what I want to do first when I get my bed shackles off. High on the list right now is thoroughly cleaning my house to my satisfaction (my husband tries but he isn't nearly as neurotic (I prefer detail oriented) as I am, baking all of the treats (its my happy place) cooking dinners and extra dinners for freezing for post baby arrival, indulging in all of my nesting instincts, taking the dog for a walk and getting as much fresh air as I want, and of course I really miss sex with my husband.... I'm not sure how that one will work with my 37 week sized belly but where there is a will there is a way!!!!!

I just hope our little bean continues to cooperate and stays inside a bit longer for his optimal health and so his mommy can have a tiny taste of freedom and time to do a little baby prep work.

What about you ladies any things people say to you that drive you nuts or you've heard so many times it's hard to stop the eye roll? Anything you are looking forward to doing if you get a little window between bedrest and birth?

For those of you still in the early parts of bedrest... hang in there! I set small goals for myself so that it didn't seem so daunting. I started at 8 weeks and I'm now at 32+5! There were times when it didn't seem possible we would make it this far but our train kept chugging along and we can almost see the final station ahead.

Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: Ksg23 on January 18, 2018 at 10:44 PM
Oh wow! I am so glad that you have made it this far...32+5 is awesome 👏 I am still in my 27th week. I wonder how will these painfully slow days pass!
I can so understand your vent post. Fortunately I don’t have too many visitors and hence don’t have to hear much. But one thing does irritate me though, all my friends, relatives call/ message me and ask me everyday ‘are you better’, ‘any improvement’- I mean better from what??? I have already told them that I am on bedrest till delivery, and with all the leaks, UTI, body aches etc. no two days are similar. It’s not like that things will improve and I will be allowed to walk in the park. Even if I am better, that only means that I will be lying down on the bed trouble free. I am really tired of explaining this, that nothing will be fine till I deliver!

On a side did you manage to keep yourself busy for 6 months? I am reading a lot, watching TV but what else?
Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: SamRose on January 18, 2018 at 11:47 PM
I read, watch tv, do mind puzzles, i taught myself to crochet. I text my husband about a hundred times a day. Do adult coloring books. So many naps. Read more rewatch series on Netflix. Read all of facebook.

My skin has never looked better since I have so much time to dedicate to facials. Same with my nails. My feet I can’t really reach anymore so they are just starting to suffer but I can’t see them so it doesn’t bother me. Sadly my hair is suffering from my hormones so no amount of love has really helped it.

I don’t get many visitors either, but I chat with people on the phone. They mean well but unless you are confined to bedrest I don’t think you can really get it.

27 weeks..... 1 more week until you can experience the relief of making it 28 weeks!
Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: Ksg23 on February 04, 2018 at 09:10 AM
Hi Sam, how’s it going? How many weeks are you now?
Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: CurlyJ on February 18, 2018 at 06:40 PM
Your stories are very hopeful. People say the dumbest things to high risk pregnant women and although their intentions are meant to be supportive I can't help but tell them off. In my last pregnancy, one person asked "boy or girl?" I said "incompetent cervix, so baby's sex is the last thing my doctors care about". She responded, "oh well, let me know the sex because I need to know if to buy pink or blue".   >:(  I lost that baby at 21 weeks and it was a girl. Another so-called friend asked me while I was pregnant, "don't you think age 37 is too old to be having a baby?"  >:(  That's just two out of many stories. So, now I am 14 weeks pregnant with a cerclage on bed rest and this time only a sprinkle of people know I am expecting. Thanks for your stories because I have been told that my anger is caused by raging hormones. I am very alone when I disagree with that "hormonal" crap and tell people that they are flat out inconsiderate and irritating.
Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: Ksg23 on February 20, 2018 at 08:50 AM
Hey CurlyJ, can totally relate to what you are going through. In my last pregnancy I was excited about everything...this time though I have just been ticking all the boxes to ensure everything is fine. I don’t know the baby gender and I don’t care as long as it’s a healthy baby...I haven’t shopped anything yet. I guess I will only think of those things while I hit the 34 weeks mark.
And I am so stressed and so angry! I have been on SBR for over 11 weeks now. Fortunately my parents are home taking care of me. But I have been shouting, getting agitated and losing my temper quite often :( I hope it’s just a phase and will pass soon.
Sending you lots and lots of positive vibes! All the best :)
Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: JayneElizabeth on February 20, 2018 at 02:44 PM
Let me just say, that I think you're such a trooper. Since 8 weeks, what an accomplishment. That's incredible .

After 4 losses, this is our 5th pregnancy, and I've now been on hospital bed rest for almost 6 weeks. Maybe 12 weeks to go, if we get that far. People have said that to me....... the oh, enjoy your rest now. People say the most horrible things.

Someone said to me last week, you should be thankful? Really? Thankful. After losing 4 babies, at 18 wks and below, and now being on bed rest, this has all been so traumatic. I am thankful we've made it this far. But, that doesn't mean that I am totally okay with it. 2 of the weeks, i wasn't allowed to get out of bed to use the bathroom. That felt like a horrible torture, i genuinely wondered what I deserved to have a pregnancy "like this" .. I wish I had found this group sooner. There is really little anyone has said to me, that has helped. Reading your guys posts do help. I have a colleague who just had a premie at 27 weeks. Her daughter was released at about 34 weeks along (which was last week for them), she told me that i'd prefer to be here in this bed, than have to leave my baby at night in the NICU -- i thought about that alot, and that helped. She was right, I would do anything for the safe arrival of this baby. I have alot of anxiety about the finger pricks, the needles (blood thinners) etc. that they have us on. I have a pretty bad fear of needles, so to go from being very healthy, and doing hot yoga every day, Orange Theory Fitness 3X a wk., to laying in a hospital bed.... Yeah, it's harsh. Anyways, you're doing great. Reading your post has helped me so much. Hope it helps you too to know that you aren't alone. Over the last several weeks, i have felt very very alone, despite support and love from friends and family, but yes -- exactly, no one gets it, unless they are going through it.
Title: Re: Bedrest Venting
Post by: CurlyJ on February 25, 2018 at 07:47 AM
Thanks KSG, all the best to you too. Jayne mentioned yoga and oh how I miss my yoga, aerobics, dancing, jogging, dressing up and interacting with my turtles. I have a pregnant one who stays in her basking area all day hiding from the horny males in the water. I tell her "you and me both, girl", except my horny male still gets a teeny bit of action above my waist... ;D Anyway, it's all for my baby  :)