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What's Your Story? Tell us. / You can do it! My success story.
« on: June 05, 2019 at 05:09 PM »
To the strongest group of ladies I know,

For the last 14 weeks or so, I have been reading through the various posts on this page looking for answers, and comparable stories. What I found was so much more: suggestions, stories of encouragement, support, motivation, advice. Now at 37 weeks, I have finally found the courage to share my story in the hopes that it will give other women out there the same courage I got from reading through other women’s stories.

 To all you strong women who helped me get through this, thank you! To all those strong women who are going through this, you CAN do this. Try to be positive, imagine holding your healthy baby in your arms at the end of this, and try as much as you can to minimize your stress.

Here is my story: At around 23 weeks, I was told that my cervix measured less than it should at 2.6 cm and was put on bedrest. I don’t remember the doctor saying too much, but his sad expression spoke volumes to me. I immediately looked online and researched what this meant. I then freaked out and spent the rest of the week crying myself to sleep and trying to figure out how I was going to deal with the consequences. I have a 2.5 year old, to whom we had already announced the pregnancy and I was worried at how she would handle the news if the baby wouldn’t make it. On the other hand, i was also worried that If the baby would make it, but just past viability, it would have such huge developmental issues, and would have to lead a terrible life once I was no longer around to take care of it. For me, in my head, these were the two options: either baby wouldn’t make it or baby would make it but just let viability with a long NICU stay and with numerous developmental issues.

At my next appointment, I asked my doctor if I could get the cerclage (which I had read about online). Unfortunately, by that time, doctor had said that it was too late for me to have an emergency cerclage. Instead, Doctor gave me progesterone suppositories, some magnesium supplements, scheduled another appointment 10 days later and then sent me on my way. Although my cervix still measured 2.6cm at this last appointment, I left the office crying, worried that the baby would come out any day now without a cerclage in place.

Things however got a little better when my cervix measurements remained consistent for the following 2 appointments. I thought “ok this bedrest and these progesterone suppositories are doing the trick, just need to keep at it”. Unfortunately, my optimism was short lived: at my next appointment (29 weeks), my cervix had shrunk to 1.9cm and my doctor immediately sent me to the hospital to get the steroid shots to help the babies lungs develop. I stayed in the hospital for about 4 days. I think those were the worst 4 days of my life. Despite trying to be strong for the baby and for the cervix (I imagine blowing my stuffy nose could not do any good for my cervix) I would spend my days and nights in the hospital crying. In my head, this was it, the baby was coming, otherwise why would they administer the shots?!

At the end of my 4 day stay, the doctor checked my cervix again and noticed that it hadn’t moved, so he sent me home. But I was not optimistic. I was convinced the doctor thought the baby would arrive soon. He wouldn’t have given me the shots otherwise. At home, I remained on bedrest, but limited my movements even more than I had when I first found out I had a short cervix. Basically, I never left my bedroom unless I had to use the toilet, and would only shower once a week (gross I know, but I thought those 15 minutes a day standing in the shower could make a difference).

Well, since then, my cervix measurements did not move. At my 35 week appointment, my cervix still measured 1.9 cm. Today, I’m happy to announce that I am at 37 weeks and from the ultrasound, the baby looks good. Doctor has finally said I can start moving again and my 2.5year old couldn’t be happier to see her mommy being active again.I don’t know when I will be giving birth, but I do know that I am finally looking forward to it.

It was a long, sometimes lonely, road to get to this point. I cried a lot, I tried to relax my mind by taking up knitting, I prayed a little, and I consulted this group A LOT!

Although I believe the cerclage and pessary are great tools at our disposal, for all of those who, like me, aren’t viable candidates for these tools , know that I managed to make it to 37 weeks without either. I believe that the progesterone, magnesium, strict bedrest and support from this group were the 4 factors that really got me to where I am today.

Be strong ladies! You can do this! My thoughts are with you all!

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