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Messages - plmommy

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I had my cerclage and was put on bedrest at 17 weeks as well. It was a long and hard road, but I made it to 36 weeks 4 days and had a healthy baby girl weighing 5 pounds 9 ounces who came home with us. She is now 2 years old. The most important things I had that helped me through was a) sheer determination b) positive thoughts and visualization (no matter what the doctors were saying the outcome might be I always knew she would be fine) c) supportive family d) support groups like this one. Good luck and stay positive!

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What's Your Story? Tell us. / Re: Scared to try again
« on: December 04, 2009 at 01:05 AM »
Hi Emilia. I had an almost identical situation to yours. My first daughter was born at 29 weeks at 2 pounds 11 ounces and spent 8 weeks in the NICU. She is now 3 /12 years old and PERFECT in every way. I, like you, struggled with the idea of having a second child. No one knew why my first came early and so I was hopeful that it was a fluke and that I could have a perfectly normal pregnancy the second time around. I didn't want to be selfish and risk a child's life, but I wanted another baby so badly that I convinced myself it would all be fine. I ended up on strict bed rest at 13 weeks for a total of 5 months. I was in and out of the hospital and almost lost the baby a few times. Due to my excellent and proactive care, my second baby girl was born at 36 weeks 4 days at 5 pounds 10 ounces with no NICU time. She is our second little miracle. As unbelievably difficult as those 5 months were, it was all worth it. However, I know we were extremely lucky and the outcome could have been very different.
I know more than a few women who had preemies and went on to have wonderful pregnancies and full term babies. But I also met a lot of women in the hospital who ended up in the same or worse situation then they were in previously.
I think that if you are going to try again you must be proactive in your care. This will be key to ensuring a healthy baby.
1st, be sure you are seeing a perinatologist. One that you like and trust and one that will fight for you and your baby. I interviewed at least 4 before I found the doctor that felt right to me. Be sure to have bi-weekly cervical checks beginning at 12 weeks (be sure these are done with a vaginal ultrasound for the most accurate measurements. I ended up having an incompetent cervix (which is a very common cause for preterm labor often not diagnosed until your second complicated pregnancy).  I would also make sure you have a very strong support system in place and prepare for possible bed rest if that so happens to be something that happens ( although I hope it won't). You will need a lot of help from family and friends if this occurs. I would also insist on weekly progesterone injections.
I would be happy to talk with you more and give you my private email or phone if you have more questions. I don't believe trying for a second baby is a selfish one. It is a risk, but only you can decide if it is a risk worth taking. If you have a good safety net of support and care than you are giving yourself and your baby a good chance of a happy outcome. I wish you all the best!
Andrea

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I'm stuck in the master bedroom.. but it's not so bad. We have a tv and dvd player. My hubby brought up a mini refridgerator and there is a bathroom. Plus I have my laptop. I've been in the hospital for 1 month so this is heaven compared to that!!

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I hear ya! I've been on bed rest for 4 1/2 months with about 2-3 left to go. Not fun. I've had a preemie before so that is my biggest motivation. I would suggest researching and even seeing pictures of premature babies to keep you motivated and to remind your why you are doing this. Even a tour of the NICU at the hospital where you are planning on delivering can be very eye opening. Out of my 4.5 months of bed rest I've spent some of it in the hospital and most recently spent 1 full month on bed rest there away from my husband and daughter. It was pure hell!! I'm so grateful to be on bed rest at home rather then in the hospital. You have to make a decision about who to compare yourself with. It's very easy to see everyone around you who has it easier and better...but the fact of the matter is a lot of people have had it worse. Your bed rest is a temporary situation. Try to look toward little goals, like two weeks at a time. If try to look at the end you will be depressed and overwhelmed for sure. Good luck with everything and I wish you a healthy and happy baby!!

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I would go straight to labor and delivery and just see whatever on call doctor they have there. They'll take you a lot more seriously if you are in the hospital. Sorry you aren't getting much support - I would also INSIST on a TVU check of your cervix.

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My doctor won't stop labor after 34 weeks also. Because my current issues I will be scheduling a csection at 37 weeks with this baby. My doctor feels like it might be dangerous for me to into labor on my own.

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Making the Best of Bed Rest / Re: 5 Ways Prison Is Better than Bed Rest
« on: February 21, 2009 at 01:20 PM »
This is hilarious - and sadly, very true!! :D  Hope you are well Angela!

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Preterm Labor: Anything and Everything / Re: Paging plmommy
« on: January 16, 2009 at 11:29 AM »
Hey! I'm holding up ok in the heat. I would much prefer some snow and freezing temps if I have to stay in bed. But of course it's perfect beach weather here. Oh well! We are very lucky to have my mom here for the month of January to help us out.  We also had to hire a full time nanny M-F to take care of Maddie. The girl we have is amazing! She spends hours at the park with her, takes her to story time at the library, and goes for long walks with her and our dog. Also, our aunt and cousins have been taking Madison to fun places like the zoo and Seaworld on the weekends. She is not lacking for attention. I just turned 20 weeks yesterday. yay! My next goal is 24 weeks - then 28 - 32- 34-36-37. It makes it a lot more doable than thinking 17 weeks down the line. I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon for a cervocal measurement so I'm praying for good news!
How is everything with you??

Andrea


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Making the Best of Bed Rest / Re: Mommy Is on Bed Rest
« on: January 12, 2009 at 02:43 PM »
This has been by far the hardest thing about being on bedrest. My daughter, Madison, is 2 1/2 and does not understand why mommy can't play with her or take care of her. It's been 6 weeks now and we still have 17 more to go. She has recently started acting out against anyone who isn't me that tries to take care of her (including daddy). Last night, and I thought my heart would literally break in half, she calls out in her sleep, " No! I want mommy!" Maddie was a preemie too - 30 weeker and we have always been extremely close! I was on hospital bedrest for 2 weeks over Christmas and as hard as it is now being home and in bed, it is nothing compared to being the hospital away from my family. We do play games, watch TV, talk and read books together. I'm trying to be grateful that I'm home and not complain or get down, but it's so hard. There's just so much I want to be doing with Maddie. Potty training, teaching her, taking her fun places, attending school functions and parties, spending good quality time that she'll remember before the baby comes. I just don't know what to do to make her understand or make it hurt less for her. The sad part is once this is done she'll have  a whole new issue of "new baby in the home" to deal with. I get really angry that she had to go through so much when she was born (8 weeks in the NICU) and now she has to deal with all of this too. It's just not fair and she doesn't deserve these struggles. Sorry for the vent, we had a really tough morning and it's just one of those yucky days. :)

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