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Messages - Angela

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What's Your Story? Tell us. / Re: everything is ok no changes
« on: April 21, 2009 at 11:18 PM »
Glad everything is ok. I can't imagine how scary it was to see that blood clot! And you are right to take it day by day, and sometimes even moment by moment is good too. "In this moment, I am not bleeding, so I will enjoy this moment."

I appreciate you sharing your story! I know it will help other women to recognize when to call their doctors and/or go to L&D to get checked out. Bleeding is always a red flag, but I think as women who are used to having periods we get desensitized to the site of blood. Plus, no mom-to-be wants to think that something is going wrong. I'll admit to being in denial PLENTY of times!

It sounds like you have a good medical team and they're keeping a close eye on you. Let us know how the appointment goes tomorrow.

Do you have a good support system of family and friends who can take care of your house, meals, and daughter when your husband is on the road?

One thing that I found to be helpful was to write out a list of everything I wanted to discuss. My doc got used to seeing a list in my hand, and then she'd sit down rather than stand.
I'd write down all my questions, plus follow-up questions. Sometimes docs seem so quick to answer that we then even dismiss ourselves. Glad to hear you plan to be persistent!

Are you going to have the doc do a cervix check to see if you are dilating? Or an ultrasound to check the length of the cervix? ALSO, they can do a "fetal fibronectin" test, which can tell with 99% accuracy if you will deliver in the next 2 weeks...

Let us know how it goes!!!

P.S. That is crazy that they are taking so long to get back to you!

I'm sorry you feel like your doctors aren't taking you seriously. That's SO frustrating. Here's some info I put together to help women be the best possible advocates for themselves and their babies when they are describing their symptoms:
 The page is called, "How to talk to Your Doctor and Be Heard."
With the amount of pressure you're feeling, you may even want to go to L&D before your appointment on Friday if you think you're having ANY contractions. There were several times when I thought my contrax had stopped and went to L&D "just in case" and when they hooked me up to the monitor I was STILL having contrax 3 to 5 minutes apart!

Feel free to ask me or the other ladies here anything, and vent whenever you need to. We're here for you!

(I've posted this on behalf of Leola. --Angela)

Hello fellow bed resters.
This is Leola from Detroit. I am almost 32 weeks and I am experiencing so many feelings right now that I am struggling to sort them out. So each week I settle on a different aspect of my life and this pregnancy and for an hour or so I talk with my therapist for the past seven weeks.
So far therapy has been a positive uplifting experience. I am a single mother of six including this baby and the survivor of many challenges. I am 39 years old and all I have ever done with most of my life is search for love in all places right and wrong. I have raised my children alone with no fathers support and chaos and confusion from abusive relationships. I carry so much guilt for what I have put my children through. I wish and pray and hope to someday never need the help of the state or welfare for any reason.
I have many talents. I am a self published author as well as a local comedian. Telling stories is all I am good at. I need help establishing my career. If any body knows a agent or promoter with legitimate credentials please let me know. I have so many dreams, I am determined to see them through. I want my children to proud of me and my accomplishments. I just want to do good things make good choices, share my story my triumphs as well as my failures. I was always told that I wasn't good enough for anything these words have stayed with me for so long I'm fighting for self esteem.
I just want other women who may feel what I feel to know that they are not alone. As well as I need to know that I am not alone because alone is a sad place to be when you are hurting. Prayer really does help me with this struggle. I just wish and pray to have good friends and acquaintances in my life because I have had my share of trash as well as my fill of fake friends and negative family members. That's all for now. Thanks for your time,
My message is keep your head up and believe that God has got things all under control.

A few weeks ago, I joked with a friend on hospital bed rest:
You know what they say... "Incompetent Cervix, Incomparable Husband."

And today, thinking of my hubby and my own bed rest days, I thought,
You know what they say... "Irritable Uterus, Amiable Husband."

Tell us what's great about your guy!

I did my most recent bed rest on a futon on the floor of the living room/family room. It was good to do it there so I could still be in the middle of the action, and my daughter could just walk on to the futon and join me for coloring, playdough, tea parties, etc.

What I saw most was how dusty and smudged the mirrors were, and I couldn't bring myself to ask anyone to wipe them down. The coffee table not being centered on the throw rug kind of made me batty, since they were right at eye level.

In bed? On a couch? Upstairs? Downstairs? Main level? How close to the bathroom are you? What do you see right now?

Do you think where you are doing your bed rest affects how you feel? Do you "bed rest" in more than one place?

 (CNN) -- Twins? Triplets? Octuplets? Sounds like a lot of stress to handle more than one baby at once. It turns out that, according to new research, multiple births are a risk factor for postpartum depressive symptoms in mothers. The study was published April 1 in the journal Pediatrics.

Researchers analyzed data from more than 8,000 mothers who participated in the Early Childhood Longitudinal Study-Birth Cohort, which looked at children born in 2001.

Nine months after delivery, mothers of multiple births had 43 percent greater odds of having moderate or severe postpartum depressive symptoms compared with mothers of single babies, the study said.

Mothers with multiple births in the study had twins or triplets, and no significant difference was found in postpartum depression rates between those groups.

"Any mother needs to know that this is a serious problem," said study co-author Yoonjoung Choi of the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health. "From the health care provider's side, any mothers with postpartum depression need to be referred to appropriate services."

The stress of multiple babies is one reason that some mothers may experience postpartum depression, experts say. The study did not specifically examine the causes behind the depression.

Mothers feel especially stressed when their children don't sleep through the night, said Catherine Monk, psychiatrist at Columbia University Medical Center in New York, who was not involved in the study.

Monk recently got a call from a mother with newborn twins who said she felt more depressed after their birth than she did when she had her three other children, who were born separately.

Multiple births can also be associated with in vitro fertilization, a process that often brings stress of its own, Monk said.

"The process of any kind of assisted reproduction is very stressful for women and couples, and can put a vulnerable woman on the edge," she said.

Postpartum depression is often diagnosed within the first four to six months but can emerge later, Monk said.

The study points to a greater need to screen mothers for postpartum depression and direct them to the appropriate resources, Choi said. When a mother goes for a well visit with her baby or babies, the pediatrician could help in detecting depression symptoms and educating the mother about treatment.

Besides risks to the mother, multiple babies have a higher infant mortality rate. Multiple births also carry the risks of preterm labor, low birthweight and prematurity, research shows.

Symptoms of postpartum depression, which affects an estimated 10 percent of new mothers, include mood swings, loss of appetite, insomnia and withdrawal from family and friends, according to the Mayo Clinic.

One underlying cause of postpartum depression may be that the baby or babies trigger the mother's memories of her own family and make her worry about giving her children a better childhood, Monk said. The mother may be unaware that she is having these associations.

"On a less-conscious level is our hopes and dreams about what kind of parent we're going to be and our anxiety about it, our fears," she said. "The mammoth responsibility about having a baby -- it is like obviously nothing else in life."

The transition of becoming a mother can have this effect even if the woman has had children previously, because different babies trigger different memories, Monk said.

Therapies available for postpartum depression include psychotherapy, cognitive behavioral therapy and medication, and some women find that a combination works best, Monk said.

Full article:

I'm compiling a list of businesses and individuals who can provide help to women on bed rest (light housekeeping, running errands, shopping, etc.)

Mamas on Bedrest and Beyond
6705 Hwy 290 West Suite 502, #283
Austin, TX 78735
Phone/fax: 512-288-0827

Pampered Momma
Heidi Cogdill
Portland, OR area

My Womb to Grow
Serving the greater Denver area as antepartum, birth, postpartum doula.

Emily Schaffer
Services offered in: San Francisco Bay Area, Marin County, Santa Barbara County and available to travel internationally.
Certified Postpartum Doula
Certified Lactation Educator
Certified Baby Planner
Telephone 415.302.6450

I also know of an antepartum doula in the Tampa, FL area. E-mail me for her contact info:

Please add others to this topic thread, and I will then compile a master list to post here on the forum and on the "Making the Best of Bed Rest" page. Thank you!!!

What is the most important thing a man can do for his partner if she is on pregnancy bed rest?
How are you handling the housework?
What help do you have? Family? Nanny?

Hi, Taryn.
I always feel strange saying welcome to the board, when it is often such difficult circumstances that bring people here. But you are welcomed, and I hope you'll reach out to us as much as you'd like. I wanted to direct you to some info on the steroid shots. Here's an overview: (about three-fourths the way down the page).

And here's an article, from 2/2/09, on the most current study about doing a second round of steroids if/when labor appears to be imminent:

Hope those help! This is such a stressful time, so I hope our group can provide you with reassurance whenever we can!

Preterm Labor: Anything and Everything / Paging Rheam1984
« on: March 27, 2009 at 10:18 PM »
How are you doing? I know the losses you've faced have been so hard. Do you feel you are coping OK? Do you have good support? Have you seen your OB recently, and have you thought about when you might try again?

How did your scan go? Any change?

Thanks for taking the time to be her advocate. I think you are right to be concerned. Here's a short answer to your question:
"The length of the cervix is expected to shorten as a pregnancy progresses, but a length of 3.0 cm to 3.5 cm isn't expected until 32 to 36 weeks." You can find more info from two major studies on cervical length and preterm labor here:

Statistically, your DD may be just fine, but I'd like to recommend two things, based on my personal experiences with an early-shortening/softening cervix. First, please print out this list of preterm labor symptoms ( for her to keep at home on the fridge and also somewhere at work.  Please have her call her doctor if she has any of the symptoms, OR she can go straight to L&D to have her cervix checked.

I'm also concerned about her symptoms being overlooked, because the symptoms of preterm labor can be so similar to the normal discomforts of pregnancy. You can also print out this guide for how to describe her symptoms to her doctor:  You mentioned that she's been having pains. Can you describe them?

I do hope her doc will do another u/s on the 9th, even if just to give her peace of mind. Please let us know how the appointment goes. And don't hesitate to get in touch!
Keep 'em cookin'!

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