Stuck in BedStuck in Bed

Author Topic: Depression  (Read 5132 times)

Reaganh3

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Depression
« on: January 06, 2011 at 08:43 PM »
How do the rest of you keep your spirits up?
Its very hard for me as a woman to be completely worthless around the home, and feel terribly unattractive on top of it. 
 :'(    Even though I'm pregnant, I feel like less of a woman than when I was a flat-chested teenager!  I'm afraid my husband resents me because of the huge burden he is under doing absolutley EVERYTHING.  There is never a break, I always need food, clean clothes, prescriptions filled, chauffuered to numerous doctor's appointments, etc, etc.  So, its like I'm not just worthless....I'm ruining someone else's life...I'm a totally negative. 
Baby Girl EDD 3/10/11.  Bed rest since 25wks (11/23/10), due to contractions & history of pre-term delivery.

kateNbumpy

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Re: Depression
« Reply #1 on: January 07, 2011 at 03:45 AM »
Oh sweetheart massive (((((((hug))))))) it is unbelievably difficult I know! One thing I can tell you though, with absolute certainty is that your husband does NOT resent you. Your giving him an absolutely precious, amazing gift, a human life which will be forever!.  He knows that this is not your fault nor is it a permanent thing. Talk to him, if nothing else he can set your mind about how he see's you and maybe give you a big hug. After all its for better for worse in marriage and if you can not rely on him at a time like this to love and respect you as much as ever then he wouldn't be worth having.
xxx

Leony

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Re: Depression
« Reply #2 on: January 07, 2011 at 12:18 PM »
Aww don't be too hard on yourself. For me the baby is the only one that keeps my spirits up when I was pregnant and bed res. Think positive and focus on the baby. The baby is your priority at the moment. You are allowed being selfish when you're pregnant so don't feel bad about not being able to do anything at home.
Think of this way at least you're at home instead of the hospital. Bed rest in a hospital sucks soo bad. I spent nearly 6 months on a total bed rest in a hospital. I was only allowed to get a shower once a week but sometimes when things go bad I didn't dare to take shower for a month. But in the end it's all worth it. Totally worth it.

Play games and stay pregnant (HUGs)

Luvmytieren

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Re: Depression
« Reply #3 on: January 07, 2011 at 08:24 PM »
Hang in three mommy! I'm a graduate with 23 weeks bed rest under my belt and I know that every woman on this forum understands how you feel. For me, I kept my spirits up by showering and doing hair and make up every day. I also kept my sanity by finding ways to contribute to the family. Folding laundry, paying bills on line, chopping vegetables for dinner, shopping for odds and ends on Ebay (make up, house supplies, baby items), etc. all allowed me to take stress off my husband while helping me maintain the feel that I was needed. You can even order food for dinner or groceries online all to be delivered to your door! Its the beginning of the year so pre-write birthday cards so they are ready to send at the beginning of each month. Take over these tasks and you will feel better. Also, let your hubby know that you appreciate everything he does! Here's a blog I wrote about my hubby while on bed rest.  http://thegoodthebadthefamily.blogspot.com/2010/05/in-sickness-health.html

You are doing amazing work so stay strong! We are all sending lots of love!

Margaret

twinjackienurse

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Re: Depression
« Reply #4 on: January 23, 2011 at 08:15 PM »
Hey! I know how you are feeling. These messageboards is what gets me through the rough days. I feel just useless. Everyone keeps telling me that I am doing such a great job growing these babies etc. but it is hard just to sit here allllllll day. Its crazy its just like every day is the same thing. I just keep my focus on these babies. They have to get bigger and be healthy! Id rather sit here for 5 more weeks than be in the NICU that long. Hang in there girl!

Reaganh3

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Re: Depression
« Reply #5 on: January 29, 2011 at 10:25 AM »
I'm feeling really good today.  We got the stroller in the mail yesterday and I helped put it together this morning.  That was so fun.  We tried to push one of the cats around in it, but they refused to cooperate!  Now, I'm trying to take it easy the rest of the day and be a better patient .....  but doing things to help prepare for the baby reminds me of why this bed rest will all be worth it in the end. 
Another way I keep my spirits up is to look at cute baby clothes online. 

34 weeks and 2 days, so the finish line is in sight! 
Baby Girl EDD 3/10/11.  Bed rest since 25wks (11/23/10), due to contractions & history of pre-term delivery.

arenee22

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Re: Depression
« Reply #6 on: February 10, 2011 at 09:04 AM »
I am so battling depression right now. I have a 15 month old and I have to depend on others to take care of him for me and that stinks. My relationship with husband is not so hot. He does what he has to do, but thats it. I feel lonely, and I don't want to talk about it with anyone else either like my family

Reaganh3

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Re: Depression
« Reply #7 on: February 10, 2011 at 09:12 AM »
I used to feel the same way.  Here is my advice: 
If there is any way you can get someone to stay with you over a weekend so your husband can take a little mini-vacation, I highly recommend that.  My sister came to stay with me over MLK weekend, and my husband went skiing for the weekend with one his friends.  That weekend break greatly improved both of our moods.  My husband had fun without worrying about all his responsibilities, he had to miss me, and he came home happy. 
I know your situation may be a little different because you already have a child at home to take care of, but maybe you can think of something similar. 
Good Luck. 
Baby Girl EDD 3/10/11.  Bed rest since 25wks (11/23/10), due to contractions & history of pre-term delivery.

arenee22

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Re: Depression
« Reply #8 on: February 10, 2011 at 01:02 PM »
Thanks for replying and your suggestions. Having all of you to talk to really helps. Its nice to talk to others that know what is happening