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Author Topic: Onto the third and taking it tough....  (Read 3212 times)

Mommaof3

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Onto the third and taking it tough....
« on: April 03, 2012 at 06:49 PM »
Hello,

My name is Stephanie and I am currently 28 weeks pregnant with my third child! My story is pretty simple... I got pregnant with a little girl in 2009 and carried her uneventfully until 35 weeks. Shortly thereafter, we got pregnant with my son who I also carried uneventfully until he was almost 35 weeks. I worked through both pregnancies and had pretty demanding jobs each time. Nothing went wrong or anything like that and I gave birth to two perfectly happy little preterm babies. I had my son July 31st, 2011 and then all of a sudden we found out in November we were pregnant yet again (much to my surprise). I knew this couldn't be good for my body, having babies this close together (since my daughter was born just one year and 10 days before my son) could not be good! Well I put off going to the doctor (which was stupid) because I was kind of embarrassed (which I'm married so it shouldn't matter to anyone whether or not I'm pregnant all the time). I had my first ultrasound at around 22 weeks and was immediately put on bed rest which was no big deal. Of course I became worried about our finances and a little upset that I wouldn't be able to help with my 20 month and 8 month old. Needless to say, I knew it could be worse so therefore I just did what I was told. They found that I had a short cervix and sent me to see doctors an hour away where they specialize in high risk pregnancies. After my second visit to the specialist they admitted me to the hospital because I was having contractions and became dilated to 2. I was here for what seemed like a long, long, long hard week. I got sent home and returned to the specialist a week and a half later or so and they said things were stable and to just remain on bed rest and didn't even want to follow up with me! Well, the Friday after that I started having contractions just laying on the couch. I headed into the hospital and was put back on MAG and dilated to 5! So here I sit.... In the hospital, away from my two beautiful children and my amazing husband! I am worried about this baby coming, but I know that I am in the best place if anything was to happen. I struggle being away from my kids, I can't even talk about it (or in this case type about it) without blubbering like a fool. I know what I have to do, but I can't help but to just want to go home. I want to lay on the couch at home but they're saying I will have to be here for a month with this being my second admission for preterm labor =( I'm at a serious loss as to how to deal with all this emotion and heartache. My house is about an hour away so my family can't come see me everyday and it puts an even greater strain on our bank account with gas being over $4. Of course my 20 month old gets a little crazy being stuck in this room for more than an hour so it's hard to have her here and it's hard on my husband to have both the kids here at the same time. I don't get to see them interact and every time they leave my heart just breaks even more. I try to be positive because I know how lucky I am to still be carrying my baby girl instead of visiting her in the NICU but it's so hard to remain positive cooped up in the hospital... Any advice??

Stephanie
Child #1: Born at 35 weeks, heatlhy
Child #2: Born at 34 weeks, healthy
Child #3: Short Cervix at 21 weeks, strict bedrest for 3 months, 7 weeks of which were hospitalized, dilated to 5 at 28 weeks, baby born at 37 weeks and perfect =)

jp99

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Re: Onto the third and taking it tough....
« Reply #1 on: April 03, 2012 at 08:17 PM »
Hi Stephanie,
I am sorry to hear about what you are going through right now.  I don't know that I have any advice, but I feel like we are kind of in a similar situation.  I too am hospitalized with a shortened and funnelling cervix and I am 25weeks 4 days with twins.  I have been hospitalized an hour away from my son who is 2 and a half and its the hardest thing in the world.  I feel like i can deal with almost anything they throw at me in here, but not being able to be with my son all day, and play with him and hear him laugh or cry or whatever is like torture.  He comes pretty frequently but there is only so much time he can realistically spend in a small hospital room before he is climbing the walls.  I have been in hospital now for 12 days and its only the beginning of a really long journey.  For me, all i can do is focus on keeping these babies inside and knowing that in the not so distant future we will all be home together again and it will all be just a memory.  I wish you all the best, and i say cry when you feel like it.  Keeping in those emotions is not going to help either.  Its hard, but it will be so worth it in the end. 

Matician

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Re: Onto the third and taking it tough....
« Reply #2 on: April 03, 2012 at 09:53 PM »
ugh - so sorry that you are going through this!! I am having similar problems with my almost 3-year old daughter AND with wanting to just do this at home. I stopped crying after a few days and hope you will too.

not sure if this will be helpful, but here are my suggestions: skyping with your family would cut down on gas costs and also might be a good option since you can do it multiple times a day for short periods (rather than a long drive followed by a long visit). You could also get some special toys/treats that your kids only get when they visit you.

Good luck! Even though it's horribly difficult and i wish i didn't have to be here, i try to remind myself that every day i spend on bed rest is a day that my little one will not have to be in nicu. (i've done that too, and it is hard!!)

Mcentire

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Re: Onto the third and taking it tough....
« Reply #3 on: April 04, 2012 at 01:11 PM »
I'm sorry you are going through a tough week. I have done this bedrest thing a few times and it doesn't get any easier. I'm so sorry you are in hospital and so far from your babies. I keep reminding myself of the payoff and I try to remembr that there will be an end to all of the hell, and you will get home. Your children are already being so generous to thier baby sister to tolerate the situation and you can be proud of them. It got harder for us as well the more kids we had, the harder bed rest was on the family. Be proud of yourself too, every day she gets to grow inside is a gift. Hang in there.
Mother of 4
#1 2004 full term
#2 2006 born at 37 weeks 1 day after 14 weeks of bed rest due to IC
#3 2009 born at 31 weeks 1 day PROM at 30 weeks with cerclage
#4 2012 born at 36 weeks  2 days IC, cerclage, p17

Mommaof3

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Re: Onto the third and taking it tough....
« Reply #4 on: April 04, 2012 at 02:46 PM »
Thank you for all the kind words. I was happy to have found this site because I know I couldn't be alone! Just knowing that someone is battling the same things (even though unfortunate because I wouldn't wish this on anyone) helps. My heart goes out to all of you and your children :) I plan to get my tubes tied... haha... I love my kids and that is why I can never go through this again!
Child #1: Born at 35 weeks, heatlhy
Child #2: Born at 34 weeks, healthy
Child #3: Short Cervix at 21 weeks, strict bedrest for 3 months, 7 weeks of which were hospitalized, dilated to 5 at 28 weeks, baby born at 37 weeks and perfect =)