Stuck in BedStuck in Bed

Author Topic: Time Magazine  (Read 5194 times)

Mommaof3

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Time Magazine
« on: May 11, 2012 at 03:57 PM »
I realize this topic is going to get exhausted but it is very interesting to me and I'm not completely sure where I stand on the whole thing. I think breastfeeding is absolutely awesome and when I look back I am kind of sad that my experience with breastfeeding is discouraging me from even giving this baby a shot. My first two never wanted to latch... I tried all the time but could only pump and give it in bottles, which was okay because at least they still got the milk. Unfortunately it's SO much work with all the dishes it makes and then as soon as you're done pumping you have to feed the baby and then as soon as that's done you don't have very long before you have to pump again so I never lasted more than a couple of months =( I know I could have done it but I always felt like I was never getting a break. Anyway, my opinion is that breastfeeding should be the first option but personal choice comes before all and all lifestyles differ. However, I do not believe that you really need to have your baby on your boob until he/she is 3. I feel like it's more of the mother not wanting to let go of their child rather than the child getting much out of it besides being way to attached to their Mom. I don't know much about the attachment style of parenting but I would actually like to read this article in Time. I have slept with my children while they were babies many a time! A lot of times it was the only way I could get them to fall asleep, but I don't think my son has slept with us since he was 6 months (he's only 9 months but I doubt now that he sleeps alone and is comfortable he would fall asleep with us) and the same with my daughter. Anyone know more about attachment style parenting? Has anyone read the article? I don't mean to start a heated debate.... Just wanted to see what other people were thinking on the whole thing!
Child #1: Born at 35 weeks, heatlhy
Child #2: Born at 34 weeks, healthy
Child #3: Short Cervix at 21 weeks, strict bedrest for 3 months, 7 weeks of which were hospitalized, dilated to 5 at 28 weeks, baby born at 37 weeks and perfect =)

Rosa

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #1 on: May 12, 2012 at 12:43 AM »
i think t article is there to expose t excessive 'parenting' that some people go to and get people talking. It's like putting even more pressure on women to just to become milking cows as society will expect them to do that. I agree that breast is best for t first 6 months, as babaies aren't really ready do eat any other food, but if t mother happens not to have enough milk (or if like in my friend's case she needs to be on medication that makes her milk dangerous for t baby) there's nothing wrong with formula. My mum had 9 kids and if i remember it well she often used formula as 'top-up', and none of us turned out seriously demented or anything. She also had better things to do with her life than sitting around breastfeeding when we were capable of eating at t table like normal people! I'll b lucky if i can breastfeed at all for 6 months and then i plan on stop breastfeeding by t time t baby is one year old. I seriously think women are being put under too much pressure to even breastfeed, it should b your choice. Sometimes there is no choice, like in my friend's case, and t whole breastfeeding pressure just added to her post-natal depression and stress. If human milk is sooooooo important and so beneficial, why aren't we buying it in t supermarket? There's women out there who have to much milk and could make a buck out of this!? Maybe women should just spend t rest of their live pumping milk like cows, for t benefit of t rest of society? I think it's absolutely ridiculous (and sick!) that anyone suggests it's OK to breastfeed a kid untill their 3yrs old, and i am quite happy to get into a heated debate about it. A 3 year old should b able to eat with knife and fork, not suck from a tit!? That woman just wants her kid to be dependent/attached to her for as long as possible. Wonder if she's still going to wipe his arse when he's 10yrs old!?
first pregnancy, IC - due to Lletz in 2010?
progesterone pessaries since wk 22 - cervix 1.6cm
bedarrest since wk 24 - cervix measure 1.4cm
hospital strict bedarrest at wk 26 - cervix 8mm
back at home, strick bedarrest since week 28 - cervix 1cm
cervix dilated 2cm at week 35

abby

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #2 on: May 13, 2012 at 06:25 PM »
Well I just had twins and want to breastfeed.  I know I could never do it without pumping and then bottle feeding.  We are also supplementing with formula.  Personally I don't need them on the breast to feel attached, I just want them to get the benefits from it.  I know it will be lots of pumping, but we can only do what we can.  I think it's okay to do whatever makes it easier for the mom.  Especially if , like me, we have to go back to work soon. 
Bedrest Graduate
Identical Twins born at 37 Weeks
14 Weeks of Bedrest

Taya

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #3 on: May 14, 2012 at 01:39 AM »
I want to start out saying that I am not judging anyone's choices. I am just here to offer some information through resources I have available to me. Everyone needs to make their own choices in what is best for themselves and their family. Here is some information for you to view if you so choose! Have a great day mommas and keep them cooking!!!

http://dianaibclc.com/2012/05/11/yes-shes-4-and-yes-shes-still-breastfeeding/


Here is a great HONEST article on breastfeeding a toddler.
http://theleakyboob.com/2011/06/toddler-breastfeeding-frustration-and-what-keeps-me-going/

USA today article
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/story/2012-05-11/breastfeeding-rates/54909940/1


http://siananigan.blogspot.co.nz/2012/05/four-years-breastfeeding.html

This is a blog post from an attachment parenting blog. She uses some swear words but brings up many great points in my opinion. Enjoy:)
http://www.conscienceparenting.com/2012/05/11/the-attachment-parenting-paradox/

Rosa

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #4 on: May 14, 2012 at 03:56 AM »
sure, bottle or breast, it's an individual choice... Assuming t individual has t choice! But i still think breastfeeding till t age of 3 is unnecessay and sick. Why not carry on till t boy goes to college? T health benefits for mother and 'baby' would b t same!... Still on t personal choices subject, i did not get my boobs out in public before i got pregnant so why do i have to start now coz others are happy to do it?
first pregnancy, IC - due to Lletz in 2010?
progesterone pessaries since wk 22 - cervix 1.6cm
bedarrest since wk 24 - cervix measure 1.4cm
hospital strict bedarrest at wk 26 - cervix 8mm
back at home, strick bedarrest since week 28 - cervix 1cm
cervix dilated 2cm at week 35

Taya

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #5 on: May 14, 2012 at 04:36 AM »
Rosa- You have every right to your opinion. I make no judgement either way. Just providing some information around the topic. You do whatever works for you!

Rosa

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #6 on: May 14, 2012 at 04:46 AM »
i appreciate that. But it's a bit misleading to call a blog 'information'. A blog is one person's opinion (sadly most blogs are just me me me me listen to me). I also try not to be judgemental, but find that more often it is me who's being judged because i don't conform to what everyone else is doing. So you can imagine i'm a bit concerned with t possibility that in  Y years time will b told that i'm not 'mom enough' coz i chose not to breastfeed?
first pregnancy, IC - due to Lletz in 2010?
progesterone pessaries since wk 22 - cervix 1.6cm
bedarrest since wk 24 - cervix measure 1.4cm
hospital strict bedarrest at wk 26 - cervix 8mm
back at home, strick bedarrest since week 28 - cervix 1cm
cervix dilated 2cm at week 35

Taya

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #7 on: May 14, 2012 at 05:11 AM »
      I am unsure if you chose to read the blogs or most of them refer to other sources and cite their information. I have done so below. I have also provided non blog related information from reputable sources as I understand your point about blogs.
      As far as Time saying "are you mom enough" My opinion is they did that to get Mother's in an uproar. I am sad because as a result of this I have seen Moms judging other Mom's on what they do instead of embracing that everyone can do things differently and that is ok. We are all blessed to have children in our lives. In my opinion is about loving them and providing them support. That is what so many of us bedrest moms have already have done to help them cook longer to have a chance to grow healthy inside the womb so they can do the same on the outside.

Sadly I have found on most everywhere I look in regards to the Time magazine people making judgments. My only reason for posting this information is to provide a factual basis for breastfeeding beyond infancy. I personally breastfeed and have to supplement my son as I am a working mother and unable to pump enough milk for him while I am at work. I am lucky that I am able to spend most of my time with my son while he is awake. I work overnights.

http://www.who.int/nutrition/topics/infantfeeding_recommendation/en/index.html

http://kellymom.com/ages/older-infant/ebf-benefits/#nutrition

http://www.llli.org/faq/advantagetoddler.html

An article written by a MD
http://pediatrics.about.com/cs/breastfeeding/a/bf_toddler.htm

Thanks for sharing your concerns about my previous post Rosa. I hope this provided some clarification!

Rosa

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #8 on: May 14, 2012 at 06:01 AM »
i know what you mean. It's just that while there is freedom of speach i will speak my mind. Too many women don't because they fear being called judgemental. I find that even though everyone screms 'choice', t reality is that women are being put under pressure to breastfeed, and now to breatfeed for longer for 'benefits' theories of MDs and 'research'. I sadly witness a friend struggling to feed her premature baby for months, and everyone kept telling her she must persist coz it's better for baby and child. I watched her and her baby suffer because if t benefits of breastfeeding. She finally gave up and started using formula only. 2 months later both baby and mother were 100% healthier and happier. If she hadn't been so brainwased by all t breastfeeding propaganda/information, she would have given herself and t baby a much better start. Just something to think about, instead of going by what you read in t news. Good night, and good luck :)
first pregnancy, IC - due to Lletz in 2010?
progesterone pessaries since wk 22 - cervix 1.6cm
bedarrest since wk 24 - cervix measure 1.4cm
hospital strict bedarrest at wk 26 - cervix 8mm
back at home, strick bedarrest since week 28 - cervix 1cm
cervix dilated 2cm at week 35

Mommaof3

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #9 on: May 17, 2012 at 10:25 PM »
I agree a lot with Rosa... By the time a child is 3 you should be encouraging he/she to become more independent and not be selfish enough to hold your child back by making them feel that need to soothed or comforted by their Mommy! I almost feel like these are the kids that are being made fun of later in life because they have no clue what to do without their source of comfort. I am all for nurturing kids, but if my kids get hurt they know they can come to me and they don't need to be attached to me in any way to know that!

I highly respect the fact that anyone breastfeeds but I do think there is WAY to much pressure around all of that... My kids were breastfed for about a month and they're among the smartest of any child around their age and have had formula! I think that pressures of breastfeeding put a lot of unneeded stress on new moms because a lot of times it's so difficult to get started. It's extremely insulting to ask if you're "mom enough". To insinuate that women who choose not to breastfeed or are unsuccessful at it aren't "mom enough" is absolutely rude, but I'm sure it was to catch attention. Anyway... props to those moms who breastfeed but I think a year is plenty or at least around there! And thank goodness for other options because having one isn't much of an option for a lot of people nowadays =(
Child #1: Born at 35 weeks, heatlhy
Child #2: Born at 34 weeks, healthy
Child #3: Short Cervix at 21 weeks, strict bedrest for 3 months, 7 weeks of which were hospitalized, dilated to 5 at 28 weeks, baby born at 37 weeks and perfect =)

SisterRez

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Re: Time Magazine
« Reply #10 on: May 20, 2012 at 03:30 AM »
Mommaof3: Attachment parenting has gained a lot of attention over the past few years and regularly receives criticism for creating "needy children".  It involves the ideas of "positive discipline", "comfort during sleep" (co-sleeping), and more.  I am not personally a fan of the parenting style, but I also have never tried it.  I did not read the article, but the title of the piece, as well as the accompanying photo (do we really need to see a 4 year old on a step stool suckling?) were more than enough for me. 

I'm pregnant with my first child, and hopeful that I will be able to breastfeed successfully for at least 6 months, preferably a year.  That decision wasnt based on any societal pressure for me to breastfeed.  I dont have friends with babies and prior to becoming pregnant, never really cared much about the idea of motherhood.  I just want the most natural experience I can give to my child, so I'm gonna give breastfeeding a shot.  I've contacted my local La Leche League for guidance and am keeping my fingers crossed for the best.  I know there are women out there that do not successfully breastfeed.  I dont think that it makes them any less of a mother, or that they care any less for the well-being of their children.  I also know some mothers that have no desire to breastfeed.  Like Tanya mentioned, it's unfair for women to judge each other based on these types of decisions.  What/how you feed your child is a personal decision and shouldnt be criticized.  I do agree with you that 3 or 4 years seems a bit lengthy of a time to keep breastfeeding.  The child has teeth and is capable of eating food on their own.  I havent read anything that conclusively shows a health benefit beyond the 1st year of breastfeeding.  I also think that it takes away some of the child's autonomy, but again, I'm new to this...so what the heck to do I know anyway?