So done with bed rest

[twinboys2]

I am almost 29 weeks with twin boys. I have been in the hospital since 24 weeks, strict bed rest since 17 weeks, and modified bedrest began at 12-14 weeks. I am soo done being pregnant. I can't sit up in the bed, I'm only suppose to lay down at a 30 degree angle or less, I can only shower every 3 days so I feel gross 90% of the time. I am here because of IC and I'm 1-2 cm dilated, 100% effaced with bulging membranes. I have been this since I was admitted. Nothing has changed. I feel so selfish wanting to go into labor so I can just be done with this. I have a great support system and my husband stays every night but because he is here our dogs have been outside all day and come in at night and go back out early in the mornings. One of our neighbors called the police on our dogs due to excessive barking and animal control is now on our case about it and I'm worried the dogs will get taken away. We are doing our best but there is nothing else we can do with the dogs. I feel like I don't need to be in the hospital because nothing is happening, I don't get patterned contractions, I'm just racking up some enormous bill. I just want to be done with this. I cannot do this for another month. I am turning into a total you know what and seems like there are more bad attitude days than there are good now. Any advice??

[claire1228]

I wish i could give you some advice but this morning I was laying in bed thinking the exact same thing, that I don't konw how much longer I can do this ! I have been on strict bedrest since 18 weeks (I am now 30 weeks). I have had 3 week long hospital stays and have been home the rest of the time. I also have to lay back at all times. My husband works full time, and we have two young boys, ages 2 and 6. I like to keep a clean house. Toys laying around don't really bother me because I know we can get them picked up in a few minutes. But to have dirty kitchen/bathroom/floors/dusty furniture/etc.....it KILLS ME ! It is soooo very hard to sit here and see how much housework needs to be done and I can't do anything about it! My husband is nothing of a housecleaner, this morning he finally loaded the dishwasher after 3 days of dishes piling up. I know he works all day but I really think he could put in ALOT more at home ! Everything I ask him to do he complanis. If I ask for a drink, I have to beg for it. Sometimes he will even say "get up and get it yourself". Really? Does anyone elses husband act this way? He is constantly in a bad mood, and fusses the kids and I all the time. He is used to me taking care of everything so I guess thats why he is responding this way. My parents and sister help us out a ton ! If it weren't for them I don't know what we would do. Our yard needs to be cut and weedeated (sp?) sooooo very bad, its embarassing ! Most of the neighbors know whats going on so hopefully they understand why it isn't getting done as often as it neeeds !!! Lord, I could go on and on and on !! This has DEFINITELY been a test of our marriage !! Once things get back to normal, I think it is going to take a good while for my husband and I to get our relationship back to normal. We love each other to death, thats whats holding us together right now. I know I just vented like crazy, but I just want you to know you aren't alone !! Just try to always keep in mind that this won't last forever and every day the babies are in your belly the better !! You CAN do this for another month, or longer if needed! Think positive (even tho it seems impossible to do so) ! I hope yall can get something figured out with your dogs. Maybe your husband can try to talk with the neighbors and let them know whats going on and that yall are doing everything yall can with them.  If your doctors have you in the hospital, then thats the best place for you ! Think about how much good you are doing for the twins. A year from now you will look back and realize it was all worth it and wasn't as bad as you thought it was. Oh yeah, even if you are turning into a "you know what" (hahahahaa), you DESERVE  to !!! If someone has a problem with it, oh well lol....STAY STRONG !! 

[jmegio]

Hi Ladies-

Hoping to provide encouragement to both of you... this is my second time doing extended, strict bed rest - should be 12 weeks for each pregnancy.  It is TOUGH, certainly a test of our stamina and faith.  I find inspiration when I read Scripture, when I focus on the positive things, when I read other people's trials & triumphs (good read: "Heaven is Here" by Stephanie Nielson), when I realize my experience can one day help another woman cope, and when I remind myself that this is only temporary (my small sacrifice is/was a big gift to my children).  The sense of accomplishment that you will have when this is all over is tremendous.  Your patience is increasing, your strength is increasing, and your bond with your child(s) is increasing!

I still have my dark moments, but I try to refocus quickly because the longer I despair, the harder it is to snap out of it.  I'm so sorry you both are dealing with added stressors, but there will be better days ahead.  Wishing you well; you're doing amazing!

Philippians 4:6...do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God

Matthew 6:34...do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself

Romans 5:3-4…we also rejoice in our sufferings because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance character, and character hope

[jp99]

Hospital bed rest was the hardest thing I think i have ever had to do.  I am also pregnant with twins and was diagnosed with IC at 23 weeks.  I never had any contractions but when my cervix got to 1cm with funnelling they wanted me in hospital.  I was there for 8 long weeks - and finally last week when I reached 32 weeks I was allowed to go back home.   I definitely found that some days were worse than others, and after about 4-5 weeks there seemed to be more bad days than good.  Have they told you if there is a target goal that you need to reach in order to go home - like 32 weeks?? I can remember having the same feelings as you and feeling really selfish for having them.  I just had to remind myself that laying in a hospital bed was the better option to watching my babies potentially fighting for their lives, and living with long term issues from being born so preemie.  I did a lot of crying by myself in my hospital room - mostly because i missed my son so much.  I can remember looking out the window on saturday afternoons and seeing all the pregnant women who were there for their prenatal classes and thinking how unfair it all was that they were living life as normal and here i was confined to a hospital bed.  The only thing that I can tell you from my experience of hospital bed rest was that the day they let me go home it was as if the whole long experience was a distant memory.  You have done so well making it to 29 weeks.  And when you reach 32 weeks thing will look even better for your twins!! Good luck and stay strong and just think of this as a long term investment!!

[Mommaof3]

I spent 7 weeks total in the hospital... One week one time and a 6 week stay. I have two children as of right now and just came home two weeks ago (now 36 weeks pregnant which makes for my longest pregnancy out of the 3!). It was amazingly difficult. The first week or two was probably the worse. Things got easier but they never got easy. I was an hour away from home and went days without seeing my babies. It was boring and miserable. There is no get out of jail free card when it comes to dealing with hospital bedrest or bedrest alone. You can only accept it and constantly remind yourself of the fact that things get better and this horrible but humbling experience will end and if you do things right you get the best, and biggest reward out of it =) There is a light at the end of the tunnel and while I didn't see it but a few times on my 16 weeks of bedrest, I see it now and everything seems worth it!

[SisterRez]

Twinboys2: is there any way to get a dog walker or a family friend to stop by and spend some time with the pups?  I know it's an extra expense, but it's probably a better option than having animal control take the dogs away.  And I agree with jp99, ask your OB if there is a marker you can strive towards.  Knowing there is a specific end to bed rest will help your mental state immensely.  Let him/her know what your frustrations are and see if they can be addressed.  I went on bed rest at 26 weeks, and my doctor told me that at 36 weeks she would take me off.  I'm at 34 weeks now, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel!  When I first went on bed rest, my fiance kept saying "remember how little time this is in comparison to the rest of the baby's life" and it made me angry with him at first, because I felt like he was trivializing my situation.  But the more I thought about it, even 9 months of bed rest is worth it for the long term health of my child.  Keep your head up.  This will all be worth it!