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Author Topic: New to site, first time mom and scared  (Read 3318 times)


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New to site, first time mom and scared
« on: June 06, 2012 at 08:29 PM »
Hello, my name is Emily and I will be 29 weeks on Thursday with my first. After being told I would never get pregnant for years because of fluid in both my tubes, we were shocked when we found out we were expecting! Over the past Saturday, I had some cramping and then bleeding after I pooped (which is normal for me). I decided to call the after hours number for the dr just in case and they wanted me to go to the hospital immediately. My fiance and I still debated to go in or not, because like I said, blood after I poop is very normal for me and every time we had gone in for little things before, it always turned out to be nothing. We decided to go in and get checked out anyway, and good thing we did! After an exam, some tests, and a sono, they told us that my cervix was down to 1.7 cm and I was in preterm labor and would be admitted. They told us they wanted to start the 2 step steroid shots just in case little Peyton would come early. After getting settled into our room, I started contracting. They started me on procardia to stop this and "calm" my uterus, which I will be taking from now until 35 weeks. They kept me until Monday morning but let me go home to be on bed rest, only bathroom and short shower privileges.
     Yesterday I woke up with cramps that were worse than I had all weekend, so I called the dr again and they told me to come back to the hospital. We got some more tests run, and another couple of sonograms and my cervix was still short at 1.7 and funneling. They wanted to keep me overnight to watch me, but my fiance and I decided if I was cramping there, I might as well be home and cramping and comfortable. So they upped my dosage of procardia and let us come home.
    I guess I am reaching out to the ladies in this group because I feel as though my body is failing me. I feel as though women are meant to carry children, even though they told me I never would be able to, now that I am pregnant and this far, I should just be able to do it. I am scared also because I have never had experience with any of this and our little girl is only 2 lbs 14 oz and I know she needs to stay in there longer but I feel as though my body doesn't want to let me keep her in there. How do you ladies deal?
Started bed rest at 28 weeks 2 days for shortened cervix and funneling. First time mommy!!
Everyday I keep her in, is a day she isn't in the NICU :)


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Re: New to site, first time mom and scared
« Reply #1 on: June 08, 2012 at 03:38 PM »
It gets frustrating - especially when you see other pregnant moms doing "normal" stuff and carrying their babies to 38, 39, 40 wks with no problems (although I have to admit that I don't miss having to go through the last few weeks as long as my baby is healthy!). I had four normal pregnancies and suddenly everything went wrong with my last one and I ended up on bedrest for 4.5 months. They told me I had very little chance of PTL happening again, yet here we are again. Other moms get to have fun with their kids all summer and my kids get to sit in the house with me all day. It feels surreal - like I'm making a big deal over nothing - then I try to get up and do something simple and the contractions start up again.

It helps to have my one year old as a visual reminder of why I'm doing this. I managed to keep her in until almost 36 wks and she was perfect and didn't need to be in the NICU at all. It will be worth it. Once it's over, it will all blend into one memory and you'll be left with the miracle child you managed to get here :) Remembering that helps. Sometimes though, I just need to tune out of everything. I watch a lot of shows on Netflix and play computer games as they eat up hours at a time. And I make it through one more day.
Proud Mommy to five munchkins - ages 10, 8, 6, 5, and 1
Baby #6 due 9/22/12 - bedrest from 14 wks due to contractions


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Re: New to site, first time mom and scared
« Reply #2 on: June 08, 2012 at 05:50 PM »
hi miraclemama-

i think it's completely normal for us bed rest women to feel like our bodies have failed us and we got cheated out of a "normal" carefree pregnancy.  but, i also think it's important to consider the positives: you were able to conceive when the doctors told you it wouldn't happen, and you're already in your late 20's, gestationally.  believe that things will be okay.  i did a lot more worrying during my first high-risk pregnancy than i am with this pregnancy (both of which will equate to 12 weeks of bed rest, each), and i think both baby and i are benefitting from positive thinking.

again, your emotions are totally normal (been there myself), but be thankful for what is going right.  afterall, something/someone led you to that hospital to stop things from progressing.  and, the more posts you read on this forum, the more you'll find ladies with similar issues, who held onto their babies for several weeks, despite the bleak circumstances.  good luck to you!!
First Child Born @ 35 wks + 1, after 12 wks of bed rest
Second Child Born @ 39 wks, after 13 wks of bed rest


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Re: New to site, first time mom and scared
« Reply #3 on: June 09, 2012 at 11:22 PM »
I always had that feeling of being incompetent like they told me my cervix was =( Rude term I think... Anyway I remember feeling hopeless as I had preterm labor with my first two and then two times much to early in this last pregnancy. It wasn't until this time around that problems were discovered and I had to deal with bedrest. I figured what business did I have being pregnant if my body couldn't even handle it! They're terrible feelings but your body has not failed you! Your body is giving you what you want =) You are pregnant and even if the baby did come now it has a nice chance of survival! You have made it to a great milestone and with the help of bedrest (be strict on yourself) and medication (even though some side effects suck) you will make it even farther!!! It will make you a stronger person and will make your appreciate your little one just a little bit more ;) I am typing and holding my little one who I held in for almost 38 weeks, my longest pregnancy =) We thought we were going to lose her at 23 weeks and hope was dwindling. We had a long journey but we did it and so can you, just follow all the rules and take it a day at a time... keep a journal =)
Child #1: Born at 35 weeks, heatlhy
Child #2: Born at 34 weeks, healthy
Child #3: Short Cervix at 21 weeks, strict bedrest for 3 months, 7 weeks of which were hospitalized, dilated to 5 at 28 weeks, baby born at 37 weeks and perfect =)


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Re: New to site, first time mom and scared
« Reply #4 on: June 11, 2012 at 03:58 AM »
Hello there,

Keep your spirit high! I know its easier to say than do. They will be good days and bad days but your are 29 weeks which is really good and leaves you with not so much road to go. I know when you look at it from your end it feels like ages to stay in bed and that you will never make it. Remember take it one day at a time and fix yourself little goals like 30 then 32 then 35 ect and you will be surprised each time you reach one of those milestones. Do not blame yourself... I had a great first pregnancy and a horrible 2nd one but at the end its all worth it. My 2nd Boy is 3 weeks today and I already forgot about all the trouble. Just follow the doctors instructions, you can drink tones of water it sometimes help to ease the contractions. You will see there are plenty of great ladies here ready to listen to you when you need it.
Good luck
Boy no1: 38+6 natural birth uneventful pregnancy
Boy no2: 37+4 c-section after 14 weeks of bedrest due to bleeding previa