I'm new here. A prospective father (It feels odd just typing that. Sometimes it feels like that prospect is slipping away). My wife tends to stay away from the internet. I, on the other hand, have seemingly reached it's ends. I've read nearly every academic paper and many, many posts here. (You women are incredible and your strength...it's no wonder why you are able to carry children, and we men cannot). My brother also happens to be a brilliant physician--so, I have learned a lot about this. I know more about the cervix then I ever could have imagined. I also know that the medical community does not know nearly enough about lots and lots of things.
Our Story: We were married in the fall of 2015. We met in law school, dated 7 years and lived together since dating for 1 year. We're two, busy, corporate lawyer urbanites. We're as tight as can be and have been through a lot together. I've had health issues that my wife has helped me through on 4 occasions. We first got pregnant in the summer of 2016. Unfortunately, we experienced a blighted ovum, which was devastating to us. My wife had a D&C in November 2016. We found out that we were pregnant again in January 2017. We kept it a secret for longer than most. We were thrilled, but terrified at the prospect of facing another loss. My wife experienced spotting early in this pregnancy, which caused us to live in fear every day. At our first scan, we saw the heartbeat of our what-we-would-learn-later-to-be, our little girl. We breathed easy for a few days, but I think that after experiencing any loss in the first trimester, you never let your guard down. I literally crossed off days on a calendar that I keep in my office that marked the end of the first trimester--when we were supposed to be "in the clear without much to worry about." Eventually, we finished the first trimester and were starting to let ourselves enjoy this. We registered for baby items and planned construction in our home to accommodate a new addition. We starting preparing our dog for her new best friend. We love our dog. I started having incredible visions of taking our daughter shopping and spoiling her rotten every day. I imagined my wife strolling our little girl down the street with that proud mama look. My wife tells me that I'm going to be the best dad. I like hearing that, but I like thinking about how great a mom my wife is going to be more. I don't really care much about me.
At our 16 week scan, the Doctor noticed that my wife's cervical length was 2.6cm, which is within normal limits. He had us come back for a follow-up length scan 1 week later. The length stayed the same ("Lots of our patients have cervical lengths less than 3cm," he said). We didn't pay it any mind. Then, we went for a routine 20 week anatomy scan. There, we learned that our baby was healthy and normal (we've been worried about baby's development since day 1). But, we also learned that my wife's cervix measured less than 1 cm. She had no pain or signs. The doctor prescribed progesterone suppositories and scheduled a scan for the next day. The length stayed the same, less than 1cm, and the cervix remained close. There was funneling. We spoke about a cerclage with the Doctor, but since this is our first pregnancy, we don't have a history of pre-term loss or birth. According to the Doctor, the efficacy of a cerclage in this instance is far from clear. He thought we would need one, but it wasn't entirely clear that it was necessary (or even helpful) at that point. At our follow-up scan, my wife insisted that it be done. 1 day later, the procedure (a modified Shirodkar) was performed. The Doctor (the MFM who also happens to specialize, in part, in all things pregnant cervix--he writes many of the academic articles) said that it was successful, that he was able to gain 2cm in length, and that as long as my wife's cervix behaved like everyone else, we'd be fine--whatever that means. We like him. He gives 5 star cervix. He actually said that he stitched his initials into my wife's cervix. I laughed for the first time in weeks.
We're thankful that it was caught in time and have access to great care.
My wife was placed on modified home rest while she healed. She's been experiencing pressure and cramps since the cerclage. We went for a follow-up one week after the procedure. The length measured b/w 2.7cm and 2.9cm. Modified rest was lifted (but we continued it anyway) and a follow-up scan was scheduled for one week later (our baby is the most scanned baby in history). 2 days after the scan, my wife started bleeding. Technically, it would be considered "moderate" by medical standards, but a clot past that was the size of my palm. I thought it was the placenta and it was the first time I truly panicked. I called the Doctor who informed me that this was not anatomically possible. We went to our hospital at 4am and my wife was admitted for the night. The heart rate monitor and tacometer showed that the baby was fine and no contractions were recorded (I've also learned how to read those). They poked around with a speculum (Very painful. They need to make those tools look more friendly. Cold steel?! Why don't they at least paint them a pleasing color?! They look like medieval torture devices. I would confess to anything just at the sight of that contraption), but couldn't see any active bleeding. They thought maybe it was a placental issue, but another scan didn't show any issues. At least we got to see our baby again. The cervical length was the same--about 2.7cm. The bleeding stopped that morning. Our Doctors suspect that it was surgical-site related bleeding--perhaps a suture from the stitch opened up and caused the bleed. Maybe it didn't heal entirely. She received 2 betamethesone shots, 24 hours apart, on Sunday and Monday this week. These shots, as many of you know, are very painful. Apparently they feel like being branded. My wife had facial flushness after, which is not uncommon.
Yesterday, we had an OB/GYN appointment. He took a fundal measurement and blood pressure. Nothing to report. Everything looks normal. No infection either. He joked about needing to induce my wife. I could have slapped him right there. Tomorrow, we have another length scan. We're always nervous before scans. Does us no good to worry, and we know that, but we do anyway.
I stare at my wife every day while she lays on our couch, with our dog, working. She has to remind me that she's not sick. No offense to you wonderful ladies, but she is the most incredible women. I can see how hard this is for her. Every tweak, twang and twitch scares her. She doesn't know what's normal pregnancy pains, and what is not. I cook and clean. I don't mind. I'd do anything for her. But I know that she wants to do things and be active again. To be normal and waddle around like most pregnant women do. To pick out maternity outfits and complain about constipation and back-aches (she has those too).
There have been a lot of tears. We just try to get through each day.
