35 weeks preg. with twins and overwhelmed with the idea of bed rest

[TripandTwinMom]

Hi,

I was pregnant with triplet girls two years ago but delivered at 26 weeks. Two of the girls were sharing everything so through the whole pregnancy we were worried about A & B (AnnMarie & Autumn) but Amelia (C) was fine in a sack by herself. We would go to the specialist twice a week and everything was going alright until one day they couldn't find Autumn's heartbeat. We ended up deciding to deliver them all when they told us that Autumn had gone to heaven. 4 days later because of some crazy fungus that Amelia contracted, she passed away as well. AnnMarie was kept at Cooks NICU for 4 months which was the hardest thing my husband and I have ever had to go through. Having two funerals for my two babies was more than I thought I could EVER get through. BUT AnnMarie has thrived and is now 2 1/2 years old and doing amazing. Now I am on bed rest for the 2nd day with my twins (boy and girl this time) and I really don't know how to deal with it. Just being back in the hospital gives me anxiety thinking about the babies Ive lost before. This pregnancy has been COMPLETELY different though. They aren't sharing anything and have been growing and developing great so far. I have just had high blood pressure so they want to keep me on bed rest until my scheduled c-section on the 19th. What does that mean? What am I supposed to do with myself? We are blessed to have family and my mom is at home taking care of Annie and our home but it is so hard not being able to see her because of Covid restrictions. How is everyone else dealing with being on bed rest? I am so used to taking care of everything (like most of us are) so how do they expect me to just sit, rest and not worry myself sick?

Any suggestions would be great!

[Angela]

Hi, there.

First, I am so sorry for the loss of Autumn and Amelia. It's heartbreaking. I lost a twin at 17 weeks during my second pregnancy, and I understand completely the anxiety that being back in the hospital is sure to bring.

It is wonderful you have come so far with your twins. I know you're still under a lot of stress, though, no matter how far you get. From my experience, anything at all that can shift your focus away from what you're going through can ease things. Coloring, knitting or needlepoint (or other craft), online brain games (Slither.io is mindless for when you can't concentrate and uses up lots of time), binge-worthy TV shows. I watched a lot of mysteries.

Another idea is physical puzzles. I like "Traffic Jam" https://amzn.to/392Y6bg, Dog Pile https://amzn.to/3pKiHrK and Coggy https://amzn.to/3hGfkiM.

Have you joined our Facebook groups? I'm trying to increase the interaction we have over there:

Public: https://www.facebook.com/KeepEmCookin

Private: https://bit.ly/3ahoO05

I know this is such a tough time. Remember that every day counts. I'll be thinking of you!

[TripandTwinMom]

Thank you so much for your kind words and suggestions!

I am so sorry for your loss too. It is such a heartbreaking thing to go through that only the ones that have been through it can understand. I will definitely look into all the games/puzzles and crafts that you listed. I love to read, watch tv and color so I will do that! I also love mysteries so binge worthy TV is wonderful. The doctor just told me that I will be delivering at 36 weeks as long as we are all healthy until then, not 37 weeks as planned since I have preeclampsia.

Bless you for taking the time to start this and let moms know that they are not alone!

-Amber

[Angela]

Hi, Amber.

I had preeclampsia, too. My blood pressure was creeping up the last couple of weeks (38 and 39), but immediately after delivery it was out of control. I could barely speak or walk and having a lot of bleeding. Many people believe that preeclampsia goes away after delivery (even medical professionals), but I've met so many women here for whom it got worse after delivery.

Please talk to your family about helping you keep an eye out for symptoms that are new or get worse (see below). Sometimes we are so focused on caring for our newborns that we don't focus on ourselves. My family thought I felt and looked as bad as I did from having a natural delivery and just being tired. I ended up at the ICU a week after delivery with kidney failure. No one knew what to look for, so please share this with your family and don't wait to go to the hospital. Symptoms are:

High blood pressure
Protein in your urine
Headaches
Changes in vision
Nausea
Swelling of your face, hands or feet
Pain in the abdomen, shoulder or lower back
Shortness of breath, feeling panicked or like something just isn't right

I'll be thinking about you lots for a safe delivery and recovery from preeclampsia. Keep letting me know how you are doing. Keep 'em cookin'!